Puppeteer or puppet?

"As for the job I was doing, I hated it more bitterly than I can perhaps make clear. In a job like that you see the dirty work of the Empire at close quarters." (p. 70, l. 13-15)
This quote is one of the key lines of the short story `Shooting an Elephant `from Georg Orwell, as it shows the feeling of the narrator and main character towards his job and The British Empire, for which he is working.
This main character is Eric Blair, a sub- divisional police officer in Moulmein Lower Burma in the times of the Raj. He suffers from the `anti-European feeling` (p. 69 l. 4) which was very present at those times in Lower Burma and is, as a representative of the British Empire, the target of hate and rejection of the Burmese population (As a police officer I was an obvious target and was bailed whenever it seemed save to do so` p. 69 l, 7-8).
In addition of being rejected and teased by the native population Eric has another reason to hate his job: he questions the ideology of the British Empire and does not believe in imperialism (´For that time I had already made up my mind that imperialism was an evil thing and the sooner I chucked up my job and got out the better´ p. 70 l. 9-10 ).
In his heart he secretly wants the Burmese to be free from their British oppressors and is now stuck between his `hatred of the empire and `his ´rage against the evil spirited beasts who tried to make ` his ´job impossible` ( p.70 l. 24-26).
The young Buddhist priests for example seem, to exist only to jeer at Europeans (´The young Buddhist priests were the worst of all` p. 70, l.5 ).

But as the main character is `young and ill-educated`( p 70, l.19) and it is his job to represent the British he does his job as `the people expected it `of him.
Still in his heart he has a “sense of guilt” (p.70, l. 19) concerning the “dirty work of the Empire”. He sees the “wretched prisoners huddling in the stinking cages “and after a while has to admit that his work in Moulmein is to do what the natives want an expect him to.
“My whole life, every white man’s life in the east, was a struggle not to be laughed at” (p. 75,l. 42-43). This quote shows the hardships of his job.
No one can blame Eric Blair for hating his Job in which he sees himself being an „absurd puppet pushed to and fro by the will of those yellow faces”( p. 74, l. 30).